I have been thinking a lot about work lately. Mostly because that’s my hobby. I work. I try to write on the side, but let’s face it; I have been working. My brain suffers from decision fatigue and often my passion is put aside because of , well, work.
My former employer use to say to me, “If you want something done, ask a busy person.” Our experience was that a busy person didn’t have time to make excuses. They needed to get the task in front of them done because they were twenty more behind them piling up. There is no procrastination or fear from a busy person. It just needs to be done, so it gets done.
Who else is going to do it?
Aha. There’s the rub right? Could it be as simple as slowing down and letting go? Or letting someone else take over the project? To relinquish that control to someone else who may not do it to our way, but will get it handles all the same. Are we really that busy or are we unwilling to give up control?
Questions to ponder.
For me personally, I am often unwilling to give up that illusion of control or be patient enough to wait for someone else to do it. I am often pissed off because of it. I don’t understand why they just can’t get it done. I am busy and I also don’t have time to wait for it to get done. I have other hats to put on so this task needs to be taken off my plate.
I get pissed at the most mundane tasks at home. The dishes piling up along the counter when all that needs to happen is the dishwasher needs to be emptied. Small, unimportant task, but it needs to be done. If I ask it may happen or it may take too long. At that point I just do it. I think my sister once told me it takes under three minutes to unload and load a dishwasher. Three minutes. I think I have three minutes I can get it done and move on.
The problem with being the person who will just do it means no one else will step up and do it. They will happily point the finger and blame you when it doesn’t work or turn out, and claim amnesia about being asked; but still won’t do it.
My boyfriend and I own a restaurant. I don’t like to say I own it because I don’t do anything with it. It’s not my passion; it’s his. He loves to cook and he loves people. It’s his passion and food is his love language. The only thing I contribute to it is my ability to have an amazing resting bitch face and a pep talk when needed. I have no experience in the food world, except I know customer service. I have realized through this business that having the ability to be customer service oriented is a super power. I have also realized that laziness is a real thing. The amount of insane bullshit excuses he gets from his employees is unreal; even my sixteen year old daughter realizes she has more common sense than these twenty-something year old boys. (No I won’t call them men yet because their ability to scream “why me” is beyond me.) They are quick to tell him how unfair he is being or that he doesn’t do enough but are also quick to shout “I quit” when confronted with lack of respect and laziness. I think my kid summed it best when she said, “So they want the paycheck without the accountability.” Wise words coming from a sixteen year old.
I keep saying I need to be trained and start working in the business because I know my ability to work. I know I can do it. How ‘busy’ do I want to really be? And at what point do I have to say, “Not my circus, not my monkeys.” (Also I have been told I am scarier than Halloween.) I don’t think I am scary. Besides everybody, it’s pizza. It’s the easiest job you’ll ever have; but it’s not. Because food needs to taste good for repeat business and customer service is an art. Personal accountability has to play a part. The employees can’t always screw around or text their boss and whine about how hard it is. It’s a fine line and it’s exhausting.
My dad is busy. Full time busy. I am not sure what all he does in his day besides worry about cows and hay and check on everyone else or offer to help. He is busy. He is also a full time control freak. He would rather just do it himself than have one of us do it or god forbid ask. He can’t help himself. He’s busy and it needs to be taken off his list. He often ends our offer of help with a question, “Are you sure?” It’s not that he doesn’t think we can do it, well a maybe a little of that, but more of will you get it done. My sister is the same way. She is a “here I will do it” So imagine working with these two control freaks full time? I have learned not say a word and just do whatever it is they finally decided and agreed.
An example of how big of a control freak my dad is he even will tell me how to back up the side by side to pick up a calf. I didn’t do it right by the way, but it still was done. He’s busy.
I guess I will end this by saying it’s great to be that busy person. We need you to be. We want those people who are always on the go; but every once in awhile we also probably need to take step back and let someone else be busy. It will still get done. I promise.