I love getting up when it is still dark. I love that quiet early morning light. This time of year everything is quiet. There isn’t a bird making a sound and the ground is crunchy with frost. I sling my feet out of bed and search for my pink fuzzy slippers. They are around here some where. If I was organized or thought ahead, they would be right beside my bed. I am not. So I pad across the cold tile to the bathroom and see them sitting next to the sink. The dogs are stretching with excitement. They know the routine. Out the door to go to the bathroom they go. I rub my eyes and look around trying to remember why I am awake. I flick on the kitchen light, because well, it’s dark and the littlest dog of our tribe is jumping around. Jax gets a banana. Well part of one, if I give him too big of a piece he won’t take it. I let the other two in and they promptly sit. They each get a little banana too. It will do until they get fed in another hour.

Begin.

We are out of dog food this morning, so I take the defrosted stew meat and dump it in a pan to get a quick warm up. Normally I would feed it to them raw but it’s being mixed in to some other grains so I give up some garlic powder and turn it off. The pack looks at me expectantly. I shake my head no and tell them it needs to cool first. I don’t know why I explain everything to them, but I know they understand. Grace sighs and Sophie keeps sniffing the air.

I turn to fix my drink.

It’s not coffee this early. I need to wake up first. My daily habit to begin my day like I had every day for two years had came to a woah when I got sick, so I forget how this little bit of liquid gold helps me begin. This being my first week back I am taking an easy route. I get on my stationary bike and turn on TBS. While I was sick I would get up and hit the sofa. In case you weren’t aware there is more than just the news on at 5 am. There is either Every Body Loves Raymond or George Lopez reruns. So I turn it on and peddle. I increase my resistance during commercials and I tend to be peddle at a good easy speed during the show. I get bored easily and often times have to resort to Instagram to keep me going or I just want to dive off the bike and sit on the sofa. I am only using this week as a beginning. I needed a transition. It’s so easy to just keep sleeping in and not working on myself. So while I think about my next routine, I am allowing this little bit of exercise to help me begin.

After my show ends and I look at my watch to see that I did make it to the 30 minute mark; because I am a little bit competitive no matter what I try to say about myself. I also have found that my temper needs a run for about a mile or so before I am able to people. The more wore out I am the better I feel about the rest of my day. Growing up my parents always told us to get outside; turns out that’s not bad advice. Fresh air and horse hair make everything amazing. It’s cold and dark, so I am happy for my indoor work out

I make my way back to the kitchen to prepare the dog’s food and kick them outside to eat. They are excited as I am.

When I go back inside, I am not as excited. I notice that Sophie (the 9 month old Australian Cattle dog/border collie cross) showed her displeasure at not getting her way by promptly tearing into a succulent and spreading the dirt across my white-ish and blue rug. It would be great if she wasn’t such an asshole. That’s her barking at the door to be let back in. She has stopped jumping on the door to just an annoying bark to remind me that it’s cold and no one has thrown a ball for her yet. I ignore the barks. And remind myself she is just a baby and this too shall pass.

My dad should be here any minute. He has been picking up Grace and Sophie to take them on his morning route. I am not sure where they all go or what they get to see; but they are always excited to get to ride along.

Begin.

I clean up the mess and hit the shower. As much as I don’t want to, I know I need to begin the rest of my day. That includes being an adult. I turn on my podcast and turn on the water. I have started the routine of putting something good and worthwhile between my ears each morning. It fills me up and I know that I have developed a routine that helps me when the day goes to shit. No not every day does. There is GOOD in each and every day. My attitude determines it and so do my thoughts. I have found it’s better to just replace the shit thinking with the I AM thinking. I AM capable. I AM amazing. I AM deserving. I finish getting ready and some days those jeans just don’t fit like they use to, but you know what, I am grateful. I am blessed. I am healthy. Doesn’t mean I don’t still don’t have off days. They are just fewer between now. I just begin.

I know it takes a effort to begin and stop counting days to begin a habit. I know once you do something enough, it becomes routine. A good routine will take you so many places you didn’t think you could go.

This December as we wind down this crazy year; I am thinking of all the ways I began. All the ways I look forward to beginning. I just know I just have to say yes.

What are you looking forward to begin? Just begin.