This has been a hard time for the recovering people pleaser in me. The world is on fire. The Empath in me feels too much.

What I’m saying is if I could politely tell you all to piss off while giving you a hug and saying I hope you’re not too mad: it would release a lot of my pent up anxiety.

I grind my jaw and I feel like I should be eating all the things.

Breathe.

Being an independent person in a world that wants me to conform is a hard task.

And trying to keep my positive mental state while in information overload is exhausting. Listening to all the podcasts and reading daily. If that’s not enough; just go on any social media outlet to be told I’m not understanding or strong or listening.

Last night I made some notes of how I want July to look. I can not control the world or even my world but I can restrict what I allow to continue. Negative energy is one thing that I can control. I might need more crystals. Maybe a moon water bath.

I am taking a social media break. It’s a system overload and I simply cannot be an active participant in it. I’m exhausted and I have a permanent headache from squinting trying to understand all the hate.

I am going to devote my mornings to me. If I can get up. I use to get up at 5 am. No matter what. I loved it. It was so much time to be alone with my thoughts and get my work out in. I had carved out my solitude. However, for about two months I cannot get up. It’s a struggle. I hit snooze until I’m frantically running around to get my work out in and shower. So, that alone tells me I have not been listening to my small still voice telling me repeatedly to take a break from the world.

I believe there are good, kind, strong people in this world. Right now the most hateful voices are the loudest. I’m trying to find the light and raise those positive and uplifting voices because God bless them; they never stop lifting us all up with their words.

It’s summer. It’s July. Our backyard is beautiful and so peaceful. It’s time to sing to my plants and spend more time out there. Sitting and swearing at bugs.

And maybe we should all do a little more of that and a little less of being entitled and self righteous on social media; the world might get back to being a better place.

For all of us.